Sunday, July 17, 2022

Lost in Tokyo: Flashback to 1998




One time, while I was a teenager in Japan, I was spending time with a brother and sister — missionary kids, same as me, whose house I was visiting.  They were on vacation from attending a Japanese public school, and so we went off on an excursion, which suddenly took a turn for the worse.  

Stephen and Nadia, their mother, my mother, and I rode the trains in Tokyo for most of the day.  At each station, we all got off, and while our moms waited on the platform, we three kids followed the arrows on posters advertising “Stamp Rally.”  If Stephen and Nadia could get eighty-nine different stamp before school started again, they would receive a prize from the train company. 

Whenever one of us spotted a stamping table, we rushed over and opened our books to the right page.  Each station had a stamp with a different picture and the name of the station on it.  After stamping our booklets, we traced our way back to the platform to catch the next train.  

One of the stations was larger than the others, and we had to go around several curves before we found the stamp table.  Pound. . . Pound . . . Pound.  A picture of a train and conductor appeared beside the name “Hakuraku.” 

Nadia, Stephen, and I wound our way back to the platform.  We were alarmed when we found no mothers, and no train in sight!

Stephen was all for running off and searching for them.  Since I was older than the other two, I had to make them stop and think.  I grabbed Stephen by the arm and said, “No, we ought to stay right here.  When kids get lost, their moms are supposed to come looking for them, not the other way around!”

I looked to Nadia for support, and she nodded solemnly.  “Sharon Rose is right, Stephen.  We need to stay here where we saw them last.” 

“Let’s go right over here and sit down,” I continued, “and pray about it.”

So the three of us sat on a dirty white bench, bowed our heads, and I prayed.  “Dear Lord, please help our moms to find us, and don’t let us be lost here.  Please send someone to help us.  In Jesus’ name, Amen.”

Our answer came quickly.  As two construction workers sauntered past, an idea flashed into my head.  I turned by instinct to Nadia, whom I knew to be the best at speaking and understanding Japanese. 

“Of course!” I cried.  “All Japanese public places have loudspeakers!  Go tell those men about what happened and then somebody can announce on the loudspeaker where we are!  Our moms are sure to hear it.”

Nadia immediately recognized this as a workable plan.  She took off after the men, calling “Sumimasen!”  [“Excuse me!]”  Stephen and I stayed glued to our seats and watched her jabber away.  The two grubby men grew concerned.  After a short time, Nadia came back over and said, “I’m going to the office with them.  We’ll come back soon.  I think they can help us.”

With that, she marched off, and Stephen and I were left sitting forlornly in the middle of nowhere — and yet really the middle of everywhere, with building upon building and swarms of people just outside the train station.           

I began to sing a Patch the Pirate song — to keep Stephen from worrying, so I thought.  Actually, Stephen is not the type to be worried by anything.  He knows how to keep his chin up.  But the singing kept me from worrying and kept Stephen from becoming bored. 

“Make me a servant, loving servant of all.  There’s no greater mission.  There’s no higher call.  Make me servant of all.” 

“Make me a witness like you, dear Lord.  Sharing the Word, till all have heard, serving, whatever the cost.  Help me draw so close to you, that your love comes shining through.  Give me, Lord, a servant’s heart.”

As my voice died away on the last note, Stephen looked up at me.  I could see the admiration in his face. “You know a lot of Patch the Pirate songs.”

“Yeah, I guess I do.”  I had never thought about it much.  I’d been listening to Patch the Pirate tapes for as long as I could remember.  When my parents and I used to drive all over America, visiting churches, every car ride included a sing-along-with-Patch marathon.  Truly, I had been blessed.

Although I was vaguely conscious of these thoughts, my main concern was to stare at the corner around which Nadia had disappeared not long ago — not so long ago, but ages and ages ago.  Suddenly, the two green-clad workmen appeared again.  I craned my neck and peered at the sad empty space beyond them. 

They came over and talked to Stephen and me.  We soon understood by the men’s carefully chosen words that we were to stay put and someone would come to ud. 

I nodded, and Stephen grunted his agreement.  Nn.  Nn.  Wakatta.  [Uh-huh.  I gotcha.]”

I said, in a more polite style, “Hai. Wakarimashita.  [Yes, we understand.]” I tried to make my eyes look as though, in my mind, I had translated every word they said into English.  Of course, this was not really the case.  However, I wanted to alleviate the men’s fear for our safety.  We probably looked like poor little lost foreigners — gaijin — to them.

When the men decided we knew enough not to wander around, they went slowly down the stairs, talking to each other — about the lost kids, I supposed.  Those were the stairs we three kids had cheerfully run down to find the stamps some minutes earlier, and had come back up bewildered and forsaken.

Continuing to chat with Stephen, I discovered that I wasn’t really worried at all.  I had faith in God’s help in trouble, our moms’ love for us, Nadia’s ability in Japanese, and the kindness of the Japanese people.

Well, it wasn’t much longer until Nadia skipped around the corner with her mom in tow.  I was so relieved, but I asked, “Where’s my mom?” 

I didn’t know if Nadia and Stephen's mother could tell I was disappointed, but she quickly explained.  “Your mom is waiting at the next station.  We’ll go as soon as the next train comes.”

When we entered the pale yellow train, we were again surrounded by uninterested Japanese people.  When we wanted to know why we got left at the station, the answer was: “I thought you were on the other train!  We saw some people with blond hair get on a couple of cars down, and I thought you had gotten on without telling us.”

“We weren’t likely to do that,” I thought.  Appalling as it was to be left behind, it would’ve been worse for us to hop on another train, and then find out that our mothers weren’t there with us!  

Actually, before we were separated, we kids had been getting on the next train car down, away from our mothers, to feel more independent — but after being lost, we stayed close together for the rest of the journey.

Finally reaching the next stop, we stepped out, and beautiful sight!  There was Mama on a bench.   Smiling, she stood up, and I hugged her. 

“So you made it back!  I was worried.  What happened?” she cried.  And we told the whole story over again. 

            The other kids' mom had her story to add.  “I went to the office here, and told the worker about you, but when I said a junior high-schooler was with you, he laughed and said you would be fine!  He couldn’t figure out that this was a girl who didn’t ride the trains every day.  He was no help at all!  I didn’t want to be a bad testimony, but I was getting a little mad.  So, I remembered that I had told my kids if they ever got lost to stay put, and I rode back to find you.”

            “That’s what Sharon Rose and I said,” put in Nadia.  “Stephen wanted to find you himself, at first.”

            “Well, I said moms were supposed to look for kids, and not us look for them, so we sat still and prayed about it,” I added.  “I’m sure glad we’re all back together again!”

WHAT TIME I AM AFRAID, I WILL TRUST IN THEE.

FOR THE SON OF MAN IS COME TO SEEK AND TO SAVE THAT WHICH WAS LOST.

Fast Facts for Those New to Aspie World


Okay, which of these items still apply to me, after all the years of trying to change and to better myself?

Aspies are:

More truthful than not

Rule-oriented

Obsessive about their favorite interests

Interrupt people while they are in mid-sentence

Have average to above average IQs


Aspies tend to:

Find it difficult to do more than one task at a time

Be uncoordinated

Have a high pain tolerance

Be very ethical and moral

Be very vulnerable to stress

Vocalize their inner thoughts

Find emotions difficult to discuss or understand

Have difficulties with interpersonal relationships

Have strong verbal skills


Apies often have confounding problems including:

Central Auditory Processing Disorder

Hyperlexia (Early Reading Skills)

Sensory Processing Disorder

Depression


Those were the items that apply to me now. Following are items that either I have grown out of, or never experienced in the first place. Many of these items apply more often to men than to women. Here's the list:

Aspies are:

Virtual thinkers 

Literal thinkers

Routine oriented

Inflexible thinkers

Weak socializers

Principally unable to understand others' point of view


Aspies tend to:

Have low self-esteem

Enjoy time spent with older and younger people more than time spent with their same age peers

Find eye contact a difficult skill to master

Have very vivid nighttime dreams

Have poor executive functioning skills

Find introspection very difficult

Copy others' behaviors, words, accents, and appearance


Aspies often have confounding problems including:

Attention Deficit Disorder or Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder

Non-Verbal Learning Disorder

Semantic Pragmatic Language Disorder (Inability to process all information from certain situations)

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

Large and small movement disorders




Tuesday, July 12, 2022

The See-Saw: Manic-Depressive Me


MANIA: THE DRIVE

  • Insomnia
  • Craving what is new & different
  • Acting on impulse
  • Frequently changing clothes
  • Busy, busy artwork
  • Believing I can predict the future
  • Desperate to get outside

DEPRESSION: THE SLUMP
  • Stuck in bed
  • Dragging along
  • Not wanting to eat
  • Reading a ridiculous amount
  • Fearing the future
  • Full of regret
  • Unable to enjoy small things
"A TIME TO WEEP, AND A TIME TO LAUGH; A TIME TO MOURN, AND A TIME TO DANCE."

Focused Concentration: Flashback to 2010


Here's a fun story about my interaction with a co-worker who is clearly an Aspie:

I wonder if Rodney & Jenny even realize that I am such close friends with the twins. They have hardly ever seen us interact, though of course they know we spend a lot of time together.

Now when I put away my laptop and got ready to leave, I figured I’d better go say good-bye to Michael. He was glued to the computer. I tapped him vigorously on the shoulder and yelled, “Good-bye!”

“Good-bye,” he murmured, without turning around. “See you Sunday.”

“See you when?” I demanded. “Sunday? Saturday, you mean. The museum.”

“September 4th,” said Michael wearily. I’m sure it dawned on him for the first time that September 4th, the day we’re all going to the Ringling Museum of Art, was this coming Saturday.

Now comes the good part – Rodney said to me, “You’ll have to forgive him. He’s – just –”

“He’s in the zone,” I filled in, nodding. And then I felt bad that I had spoken so sharply – not for Michael’s sake, but for Rodney’s! I can’t fault Michael for acting like himself, but I was surprised how much it hurt that he didn’t look at me to say good-bye. I usually have his full attention every time I open my mouth.

Poor Rodney, though, must have been mortified that Michael and I were rude to each other. What I say is: close friends are allowed to be rude to each other once in a while – especially when tired and stressed!

But if Rodney doesn’t realize how well I know Michael . . . well, I just hope he didn’t give Michael a talking-to. LOL. Especially considering that I called Rodney last month to ask which weekends Michael and Matthew would be free to go to the museum!

"LOVE IS NOT RUDE."

Words to My Younger Self: Guest Post by Leah Tait

 


💕Dear Little Leah,

I can't remember why you look so sad in this photo but your eyes tell me you'd been crying. I know you've been told a lot that you're just too sensitive. You didn't really understand what that meant, so most times you felt ashamed. You'd run and hide or try to push them down before they had a chance to surface.

Remember all those hiding places at Garden Park? That guilt got pretty heavy...not knowing what to do with all those big emotions, didn't it?

It's not your fault, sweet girl. You didn't know any better, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with you. How I wish I could rewind time, hold your hand while you hid on that roof top, and whisper to you . . .

Guess what, lil' one? You are NOT your feelings. You may be feeling sad but that is not WHO you are. Knowing that the two are completely separate will change your life, honey.
Any time you have a thought, a sentence in your brain . . . it elicits an emotion within you. The emotional response could be sadness or joy or any other feeling.
Every person feels negative emotion 50% of the time and positive emotion the other 50% of the time. The negative emotions are part of the experience, so you are living that experience! There's no need to run away and hide.

You're not too sensitive - you're just right 🥰

"SORROW IS BETTER THAN LAUGHTER: FOR BY THE SADNESS OF THE COUNTENANCE THE HEART IS MADE BETTER."

To connect with Leah, the writer of this post, follow her on Instagram. Her handle is @leahtaitlifecoach.

Sharon Rose's Instagram handle is @srenterline.